It’s Not Really About Abortion

We all suffered this as young ones. Some party, holiday, BBQ. A huddle of adults conversing intelligently about topics. Maybe it was curiosity, perhaps we had a question, or we were just tired and need to be comforted by our parent. We innocently approached the “adults”, awkwardly waiting or wondering when we should speak our interest. Then, the dreaded spotlight, “Hey, looks like someone wants to join the adults (group laughs adoringly). Not now, this is grown-up talk. Go on, play with the other kids.” Humiliation, embarrassment, invalidation, patronization. Being reduced to a human being not worth acknowledging, speaking to, entertaining any care or concern. Zero respect. Even as children, who’ve experienced very little of life’s cruelties, are very aware this feels awful.

THAT feeling. Women have never stopped combating a male run nation that, by nature, expresses that feeling. Even if you are in the home, cooking, cleaning, caring for the children, letting your husband lead, you will not escape this feeling. Even the most perfect husbands will be dissatisfied from time-to-time, rendering you inadequate.

Why do we have this problem? How can we fix it? The answer is simple. From inception of this nation, women were not equal. Fixing that narrative is up to men. Men would need to champion that belief; women are equal in our nation.

Overturning Roe vs Wade isn’t about denying a woman’s right to obtain an abortion. It’s taking away a right from women. Additionally, it’s telling women “Legally, you have no control over your body in this matter.” Women without this option, whether you agree or not, are being forced to live by a set of rules based on men’s values/beliefs, not what’s lawful. What if you don’t believe in God? That won’t matter.

Men are free to get vasectomies without protestors outside of their doctors’ offices holding up images of bloodied fetuses and signs telling them “God Hates Murderers” and “You’re Going to Burn in Hell”. I also know the Bible is very clear about how God views a man “spilling his seed upon the ground…” No courts ever argued whether vasectomies were legal. In fact, vasectomies were performed for sterilization, eugenics or, for a period, to increase men’s vigor.

A lot of my friends shame me for giving up to easily. They believe there’s still a chance. The document that was leaked was a “draft”. Minds can change or maybe it was purposeful to see how the nation would react. One of my friends, a man ironically, is so confident things will change. It makes me sad for him. I don’t have the heart to tell him that we, women, were never equal, even when he thought we were.

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